Day 29: Hopes, dreams, and plans you have for the next 365 days

I need to get out of here! In a month or so I should hear back from UT Austin so I plan to spend most of the next year in graduate school, God willing. I’ll be back in a city with art, crowds, lots of places to shop and eat and lots of new people to meet.

I don’t mean to sound ungrateful. The people I’ve met here are great. It’s not their fault I don’t have a job here. I just can’t sit around on my butt all day anymore. It’s driving me nuts. And I was already “crazy” to begin with.

So in the next 365 days I hope to be almost half way through my Master’s studies, hopefully have at least a part time job, an apartment….oh and if only I had a boyfriend too that would just be the icing on the cake.

Well, we can only wait and see.

Published in: on February 14, 2011 at 10:11 pm  Leave a Comment  

Day 28: A scar you have and its story

Ugh this is the one that reading through the list I’ve been dreading. I could easily lie and no one would know the difference…no one really reads this anyway but I hate lying. I know I’m not required to do this either but I really nevertheless though not in too much detail.

Very long story short: I have a scars on both my wrists from the ropes that held me down and one on my right breast where my attacker bit me. They are small, hardly noticeable but I know they are there and they drive me crazy at times. If memories weren’t enough…and emtional damage, I don’t need physical reminders as well. Ick.

Published in: on February 13, 2011 at 12:25 pm  Leave a Comment  

Day 27: A physical feature you love

On myself or on others?

Cause on guys….I don’t really have on specific feature that stands out. As long as the overall package is pleasing….I’m not going to say no to a guy just because he’s nose is a little funny. If he’s ugly that’s another story. 🙂

On myself….to be blunt….I’ve got a nice chest. 🙂 Not too big, not too small.

Published in: on February 11, 2011 at 11:26 pm  Leave a Comment  

Day 26 – A Childhood Memory

This is kind of funny because at the moment I am working on a list of 100 childhood memories for Swapbot. Right now I’m up to about 66….so here are the first five.

 1. I loved to help collect the communion cups because my grandparents were in charge and would give each kid candy for helping.

2. I tried to read every Nancy Drew book I could find.

3. My brother Josh used to run and hid everytime we turned on the bath water. I don’t know if he was scared of drowning or getting clean.

4. We used to make ‘scarecrows’ out of old clothes filled with leaves. Sarah H. helped once!

5. My mom once mentioned when I was very young that she hoped my Dad didn’t get lost in the fog. I thought she said frog and imagined this great big green frog swallowing my Dad’s car.

Published in: on February 11, 2011 at 12:05 am  Leave a Comment  

Day 25: A recipe

I LOVE making Rice Pudding…this actually isn’t my recipe. Mine is a little different but its secret lol. Actually its not online and I dont’ feel like typing it out but this one sounds pretty good too.
3/4 cup uncooked white rice
2 cups milk, divided
1/3 cup white sugar
1/4 teaspoon salt
1 egg, beaten
2/3 cup golden raisins
1 tablespoon butter
1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
1. In a medium saucepan, bring 1 1/2 cups water to a boil. Add rice and stir. Reduce heat, cover and simmer for 20 minutes.
2. In another saucepan, combine 1 1/2 cups cooked rice, 1 1/2 cups milk, sugar and salt. Cook over medium heat until thick and creamy, 15 to 20 minutes. Stir in remaining 1/2 cup milk, beaten egg and raisins. Cook 2 minutes more, stirring constantly. Remove from heat, and stir in butter and vanilla
Published in: on February 9, 2011 at 10:15 pm  Leave a Comment  

Day 24: A movie no one would expect you to love

Ok, forgot about this thing for a while but I am determined to finish since there are like 6 left. This one though…I mean, come on. All my movie choices are real weird and even though I feel like I’ve used this for an answer like 20 times already, The Scarlet Pimpernel. It really is a misfit though compared to all the sci-fi/adventure movies like Star Wars, Harry Potter, BTTF, etc. Yes, it does have adventure but a lot of it is gooey really overdone romance but I don’t, I love it kind of like A League of Their Own too. Some movies are good, you just have to be in the right mood in order to watch them. 🙂

Published in: on January 30, 2011 at 1:09 am  Leave a Comment  


1.  If we can’t lose our salvation what happens to the child who sincerely believes and accepts Christ at like five but grows up to become an atheist?

Because beliefs can change just like a child believes in Santa at 5 and then is told he’s not real…
Or if you believe we can then does it simply determine what time of life we die at? Because if you believe as a child, then turn away from God can you not repent and accept Christ again? So if you think the person lost his/her salvation when he turned away from God and regained it later wouldn’t it suck to die in the inbetween time? But I guess that same arguement applies to anyone who dies without trusting God.
2. I’m supposed to stand up for myself and tell someone when I’m uncomfortable. I’m also supposed to determine what things are not really dangerous but only a result of my messed up thinking because of mental illness and bad experiences. So, if someone makes me uncomfortable, but its probably just because I’m crazy and looking at it screwed, what am I supposed to do? Accept the behavoir even though it scares the shit out of me or distance myself from the person and isolate myself because of screwed thinking?
3.  Is there really any point to going to grad school? Except for getting out of this house, which really is a great reason. I can’t stand anymore of the screaming and arguing. Jenna is out of control again. She is going anorexic again and Mom doesn’t have the strength or gumption enough to do anything about it and Dad has been beaten down by both Mom and Jenna so many times I don’t think he will try to intercede.
4. Do you love someone because they make you smile and know you or because they are hot and sexy? Seem like a stupid question? Well what happens when someone is everything you want except physically attractive? Can you love someone you think looks sort of ugly?
Published in: Uncategorized on January 24, 2011 at 9:31 pm  Leave a Comment  

Swapbot 100 Question Swap


  1. What is your full name? Jessica Joy Bennett
  2. How many stuffed animals do you own? Wow, I don’t know my little sister has absconded with most of them probably about 25
  3. One charity organization you think is worthy of your money? RAINN (Rape, Abuse and Incest National Network)
  4. Favorite zoo animal? The monkeys are always fun to watch!
  5. If you could fly anywhere around the world, where would you want to fly to and why? Russia. I specialized in Russian History in school and have yet to visit because I don’t have any money.
  6. Shoe size? 9
  7. Favorite School Subject? History
  8. Have you ever eaten at the Costco food court? No, I haven’t ever even been to a Costco. I have eaten in the Sam’s foodcourt though.
  9. Favorite pizza topping? Mushrooms
  10. What kind of laundry soap do you buy? Whatever is on sale!
  11. Do you like to take pictures? Yes! I was actually a photography major originally.
  12. Favorite child -hood toy? My teddy bear Cuddles
  13. Favorite novel/book? Oh I have so many. Top of the list includes Gone with the Wind, A Handmaiden’s Tale and Anna Karenina
  14. Do you like to go on nature walks? Depends on the weather and company 🙂
  15. Pepsi or Coke? Ummm, coffee? I don’t drink soda.
  16. What TV character inspires you? Miss Alice from the old PBS show Christy, it only played one season. Tyne Daley played the character.
  17. Did you watch the 2011 Miss American Pageant? Nope, the whole concept was iffy to begin with and its really gone down hill lately.
  18. Blockbuster or Netflix? Netflix. I can ” now stream instantly through my Wii console!”
  19. Hamburgers or Cheeseburgers? Veggieburger….but with cheese. 🙂
  20. If you were trapped on a deserted island for 60 nights and 60 days, what 5 items would you take with you? Ipod, a  looong book, food, water, writing supplies
  21. Do you have children? If so how many? How old are they? No I do not. But I have 4 younger siblings that seem like my kids sometimes. The youngest is only 4.
  22. What kind of car/truck do you drive? 99 Hyundai Sonata, his name is Jacob and he’s gay. Lol
  23. Ultimate dream vacation? Castle Tour in Europe
  24. Favorite Disney character? Belle from Beauty and the Beast or Jessie from Toy Story 2
  25. When is your birthday? June 10th
  26. Have you been to college? If so what did you major in? Yes. I majored in History and English.
  27. Chocolate or Vanilla? Depends what it is. Vanilla Cake but Chocolate Icecream
  28. Ever been to Washington DC? Yes I have.
  29. Favorite wild animal? One of the big cats, probably a cheetah
  30. Are we there yet? Nope, only 30% finished.
  31. Favorite clothing brand? Brand, I’m not sure but I like to shop at Forever 21 and Ross. Thrift stores are cool too.
  32. Do you like to cook? No, not really. I like to bake every once in a while ie when I’m really bored and all the dieting people in my house refuse to buy cookies.
  33. Favorite household chore if any? Um, I take the definition of chore to means something I don’t want to do lol
  34. Are you bored yet? Nope. I was bored before I started. That’s why I’m doing this.
  35. How did you hear about swap bot? I started making ATCs on Craftster and google searched other places to trade them.
  36. Did you have a good News Years? What did you do to celebrate it? It was kind of laid back. I just stayed home with the fam. We watched the fireworks from our balcony which is kind of cool because they are legal in Texas so its like a 360 degree show. I made gingersnap milkshakes, those were good!
  37. Favorite season?Autumn or at least it was when I lived up north. Down here in the south, its all one big season it seems.
  38. Do you have a nickname? If so what is it? I’ve had a lot of them over the years: Jess, Jessi, Jessa, Jekah, Jessthemess, Radrain…
  39. Your best friend’s name? Amanda, we have been friends since 2nd grade.
  40. Pizza or spaghetti? Pizza
  41. Enchiladas or burritos? Enchiladas
  42. Do you have any tattoos? Yes. I have an anklet with 5 charms. A heart, a ‘J’, a crown, a circular pendant and “joy”. I actually had to look, I couldn’t remember the last one…wow.
  43. Wide ruled or college ruled paper? college ruled
  44. Sears or JC Penny? JC Pennys
  45. Ever been to California? No but I might be going to Napa in a month or so
  46. What TV show from your child hood would you like to see come back on the air? Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego?
  47. Body wash or bar soap? Body Wash. I cant help but think of where the soap has been when I share a shower….eeek.
  48. What kind of computer do you have? Well I have a Gateway that won’t turn on so I’m working off an old Dell XPS M140 that is missing half its keys.
  49. Smart phone or regular phone? I have a regular one. I wouldn’t mind getting a smart phone if they weren’t so expensive.
  50. Do you need new furniture? Only the couch in the family room. It looks ok but it smells kind of funky.
  51. Where do you buy groceries at? H.E.B.
  52. Where do you buy clothes at? Forever 21 and Ross
  53. Ever had a pillow fight? Ummm. Probably, I can’t remember though.
  54. Did your parents give you a car at the age of 16? No. I bought my own at around 18 I think.
  55. Ever been in a car accident? Yes.
  56. Do you drink? A little now and then, socially.
  57. Do you smoke? No
  58. Ever been to Detroit, Michigan? On the outskirts in Yypsalanti, went to a NASCAAR race.
  59. Ever been to Alaska? Nope.
  60. What are you afraid of? Spending life alone, not making it into grad school
  61. What is your weakest link? I’m not a trusting person at all and tend to be depressive.
  62. Bikini or one piece swim suits? Well I like one pieces better but I’m 22 and afraid of being made fun of so I wear a Bikini…little messed up right? Lol
  63. Ever been skinny dipping? Yes
  64. Have you ever worked at McDonalds? Nope
  65. Rain or Snow? Rain
  66. Favorite comedy movie? Wha’ts Up Doc?
  67. Favorite action flick? Indiana Jones or Star Wars
  68. Do you like chick flicks? No, not really.
  69. Cookies or brownies? Brownies
  70. Do you use a bath robe? Nope
  71. Scrunchies or hair ties? Hair ties, I may have been born in the eighties but I left them behind lol
  72. Hotel or Motel? If it weren’t for the money, Hotel
  73. Do you believe laughter is the best medicine? It sure helps
  74. Do you like buffet restaurants? Yes because I don’t eat meat so I can just get all the sides without making a special order.
  75. What would you do if suddenly the whole computer system world crashed? Die. And then go back to my books and crafts.
  76. What do you think will happen in December 2012? I don’t know, hope I”m around to find out.
  77. Are you bored yet??? Nope, keep it coming.
  78. Mickey Mouse or Donald Duck? Donald Duck, Mickey is too goody-too shoes lol
  79. Spongebob or Patrick? Patrick
  80. Lightning MCQueen or Tow Mater? Tow Mater (I’m beginning to see that I go for the underdog lol)
  81. What the heck? I know, right!
  82. Advil or Tylenol? Advil
  83. If you could change one thing about the world today what would it be? No more cause for tears.
  84. How many pen pals do you have? At the moment, none.
  85. What magazines do you read? Whatever comes in the mail. My sister gets Cosmogirl, my mom gets Family Circle and something else…grandfather gets The Week. I pick up the craft magazines when I’m in the bookstore.
  86. Favorite author? William Faulkner, hey I was an English Major
  87. What radio stations do you listen to? Hotkiss
  88. Do you remember the 80s era well? Did you like it? Not really. I wasn’t born until the end of it.
  89. Flintstones or the Jetsons? Flintstones YabbaDabbaDoo!!
  90. What have you done to make a difference in someone’s life? Been loyal. I always try to be there when a friend needs someone to talk to and I’m involved in a lot of volunteer services that I hope make a difference in people’s lives.
  91. VHS or DVD? VHS. DVDs just don’t last in my house. They get scratched too easily. I have tapes I’ve had for over 20 years that work fine and DVDs I’ve had to replace twice already….argh.
  92. Have you ever been to jail? Nope. Mental institution…almost the same thing lol
  93. Favorite board game? Scrabble
  94. Do you play games on pogo? Yup, scrabble lol
  95. How much wood does a wood chuck, chuck if a wood chuck could chuck would? He would chuck as much wood as a wood chuck could chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood.
  96. How much is that Doggie in the Window? You mean the one with the waggily tail?
  97. Did Grandma really get run over by a reindeer? Yes. She was drinking far too much eggnog.
  98. Did you make any New Years Resolutions? No. Lol. I said I want to get a boyfriend and a job and then my mom said that really didn’t rely solely on me.
  99. Where were you in 1999? 5th grade in Cherry Hill, NJ
  100. Would you like to be pen pals with me? Sure!
Published in: Uncategorized on January 19, 2011 at 2:28 pm  Leave a Comment  

It’s a private thing

It’s a private pain

That leaves a permanant scar

It’s a private sting

It’s a private stain

That is always nearer than far

Published in: on January 17, 2011 at 7:28 pm  Leave a Comment  

Day 23 – A Way in Which You Want to be Remembered

I want to be known as a person who overcame her past and was able to put it to use in order to help others. I want to be known as intelliegent but not a know-it-all. I want to be seen as kind and compassionate.

Published in: on December 26, 2010 at 2:39 pm  Leave a Comment